Cold feet, sweaty palms and heart palpitations? Is it just pre-marriage jitters or time to bow out before the organ music starts? How can anyone be sure he or she is ready to get married?
Despite the high divorce rate, marriage is usually entered into as a lifetime commitment, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live. But sadly, the reality can be heard on television talk shows almost daily; broken promises, couples who can’t stand their inlaws, couples who fight over housework or hairdos.
Here is some advice on questions couples can ask themselves to determine if they are ready to get married.
Can we relax together? In other words, do we enjoy just being together? Do we like one another as friends? Can we be friends? That is the important part. Can we talk together about problems and actually get somewhere? Are all past romantic relationships done with, including emotionally?
In other words, is this person sure he or she is in love with this person and not just in love with the idea of being married? Are we in agreement regarding our religious beliefs and moral values or can we at least agree to disagree peacefully?
Do I want this person to be the mother/father of my child? When I think of this person as mother or father rather than lover or friend, do I like what I see? Are we in agreement regarding parenting, financing and household responsibilities such as who goes to work, who stays home, who does the laundry?
A 100 percent commitment to each other is a key. Thinking “Well, if it doesn’t work out we can always go our separate ways,” is not commitment. In a happy marriage there is commitment and fidelity, with no emotional affairs or physical ones. In a happy marriage there is good communication. Happy marriages are between individuals who respect each other as intelligent persons, as individuals.